After the last class teaching novice monks today, I spotted the one who reminds me of myself: he has the vision. We spoke about “good” and “bad,” and though his English was limited, our conversation was meaningful. He reminds me of my past, and ruminating on that, perhaps I have lost some focus in recent years.

Thailand has given me the distance required to attain a fresh perspective and objectively evaluate my life. Today I broke down at the monestary, maybe because I starting writing a postcard to my real father (whom I’ve never contacted).

Much of existence remains to be sorted… and will most likely always be so, because the magic is best left untranslated. Much to do, to reset and recalibrate; change priorities and focus only on what matters, what has deepest meaning.

Though I write novels, I have the heart of a poet, so maybe it’s time to continue writing the book of poetry I put aside a year ago. Come August 17th, I’ll have lived three years without television. Now it’s time to let something else go: facebook or music. Perhaps the internet itself.

Discipline is difficult, yet I have a deep desire to become a monk… at least for a short time. Doing so will further push me onto the proper path.

What destinations does destiny hold? Too fragile to penetrate… living is ultimate discovery!